Once Upon A Time A Dog and Cat Were Friends… I Wish

 

This pretty much sums up the relationship between my dog and my roommate’s cat.

DAY 752 – My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant.

DAY 761 – Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded, must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair…must try this on their bed.

DAY 774 – I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The Bird on the other hand has got to be an informant. He has mastered their frightful tongue (something akin to mole speak) and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room his safety is assured. But I can wait. It is only a matter of time.

 

I can only hope Lil (the cat) will one day love Darla (the dog) as much as she loves her.

 

If they were to ever have an actual conversation I feel it would go something like this:

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Posted on November 1, 2012, in Humor, November and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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