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Once Upon A Time A Dog and Cat Were Friends… I Wish

 

This pretty much sums up the relationship between my dog and my roommate’s cat.

DAY 752 – My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant.

DAY 761 – Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded, must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair…must try this on their bed.

DAY 774 – I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The Bird on the other hand has got to be an informant. He has mastered their frightful tongue (something akin to mole speak) and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room his safety is assured. But I can wait. It is only a matter of time.

 

I can only hope Lil (the cat) will one day love Darla (the dog) as much as she loves her.

 

If they were to ever have an actual conversation I feel it would go something like this:

Airplane Windows that Don’t Open…A Real Problem…

I’m not one to go into an election with a preset notion about which side I’m for or against. I would rather see what both parties have to offer and then make my final decision. Mitt Romney has, much like Sarah Palin, been ridiculed for many things he has said. I get so mad because he just makes it so frustratingly hard to not laugh at some of things he says. I mean… I’m sure he’s a nice guy and all, and would make a great president, but come on… GIVE ME SOMETHING…. Semi-smart… so I don’t think you’re a complete idiot.

Okay, so maybe I’m being a little harsh… I say a lot of ridiculous things that I wouldn’t want people to take me seriously from… but then again, I’m not running for presidency. I mean maybe he is just joking… in a weird way that really no one understands except him…  I’ll let you decide for yourself…

“When you have a fire in an aircraft, there’s no place to go, exactly, there’s no — and you can’t find any oxygen from outside the aircraft to get in the aircraft, because the windows don’t open. I don’t know why they don’t do that. It’s a real problem.” – Mitt Romney

After watching this video, however, I realized that much of what he said here, as well as the tone of his voice, makes me realize that he is, in fact, joking… I think? Reading what Mr. Romney said and listening to it, are two different things. I find that this happens a lot these days when it comes to social media or texting/emailing. Someone who doesn’t know you may not know the tone you are trying to use.

I think the problems with presidential elections are that A: the media over exaggerates everything and will do anything to find a way to make you look bad; and B: you never know if what you say will be taken in the wrong way or out of context. Its almost as if this whole thing is a total joke… Like maybe they should just wear paper bags over their heads or put duct tape on their mouths any time they are in public…

Really… then again… maybe I’m wrong and he is being serious. I doubt he would joke about his wife being in a plane accident… either way; the mockery on the Internet has been quite entertaining because of it…

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